August 21, 2003

Dying Over Something That Never Was
Incompetent, blithering smackhead Smarmy McAWOL was interviewed by the Armed Forces Radio and Television Service, last Thursday at 1:55 p.m. Pacific Coast time.

Q: The families of America's fighting forces, they make huge sacrifices in the name of freedom, just like the service members. You touched on it earlier. You touched on it in your speech today. For months at a time, they give up their service members, they don't know where they are, they don't hear from them; they don't know if they're safe; they don't know if they're dead or alive. What message do you have for these families today?

Chimpy McGolfcart: Well my messages is that what your loved one is doing is the right thing for the country. We are called upon to defend the United States of America. I take that oath, and every soldier takes that oath. And on 9/11 our world changed and we realized the country was vulnerable and we better do something about it. And the best way to secure the homeland is to get the enemy before he gets us. At least that's my attitude. And so I — first of all, the commitment that their loved ones have made, the families of the service members have made, is in line with this business about winning and fighting war. Every person is a volunteer in our military. They've chosen to defend the United States of Amerca. And therefore they need to get the best — if that's their attitude, and they made up their mind that's what they want to do, then my job is to get them the best equipment, the best pay, the best training possible, so if we ever have to send them in, they'll be able to do the job.

Bring 'em on! Let's roll!

The true world gets on without this sort of wandering, delusional language.

- - From a column by Jimmy Breslin.

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